Writing a blog seems on like quite a self conceited exercise. What is so special about me that would mean complete strangers for the most part would voluntarily read my semi-regular musings?
On the face of it nothing. I’m not a special case. I may have some experiences, life lessons for want of a better word that people might latch on to as inspiration or perhaps as an example of what not to do.
Please don’t mistake my intentions though. I am in no way using this blog to highlight my stories as a beacon for lost souls or as a ‘How to guide’. In reality these are the words of a 38 year old male who still hasn’t decided what he wants to be when he grows up; sounds a little glib and contrite but for the most part it’s true. I am an extremely happy husband to a beautiful wife, father of two gorgeous children and semi successful in employment terms in the profession that selected me.
I choose that turn of phrase as I work at the same place as I did after leaving full time education. Twenty years after starting that short term contract in the big city, I am now what you could call a career Civil Servant. It’s not a term that I am embarrassed by or makes me feel any less proud of what I have achieved since leaving school with little to no education whatsoever but it is what it is. Will I be sat at retirement age, whenever that may be still wearing that badge with pride, who knows. What I do know today is I am respected by my peers and recognised by my seniors as someone who is trusted and for now that is enough. Well the pay increases over the years have also gone along way to making it so but for the most part I am happy with my lot.
At home, at work, in life. I am extremely happy. But with the impending threat of middle age looming in the not to distant future I am considering a few important and perhaps not so important questions
Does this make me a grown up?
If yes, do I have to start dressing more age appropriate. Cut my hair, trim my beard?
Should I like wine now or am I allowed to admit that in all honesty most alcoholic drinks taste disgusting and I’d much rather a coffee or a Pepsi Max?
Why am I so forgetful?
Is it safe to say liking wrestling isn’t something I’m going to grow out of?
After 18 years in Durham shouldn’t I have a Northern accent by now?
When will I stop feeling like a fat guy in a skinny suit?
Will I ever pass my driving test?
Why am I so forgetful?
Is my chance of a professional football career definitely over?
Why am I so clumsy?
Should I buy a comfy pair of slippers now?
Am I fit for 40 or will I be forever a child in a mans body simply playing at being an ‘adult’?
This blog is my attempt to remember the past, reassess my experiences and the lessons I could have and probably should have learnt.
Am I the man I am now because of what has already happened or because of what is yet to happen?
At the heart of it my family are my everything and I will always strive to give them the best life and for that to be the case I need to be the best I can be. At home, at work. In life….
The world is filled with endless possibilities. Adventures to embark on no matter how big or small.
Today is the first step of that journey forward but first I need to look back over the past. The happy memories, the painful ones. The uncomfortable and sometimes hilariously comical
This blog is my opportunity to reflect, to say ‘out loud’ the thoughts that normally stay unsaid or are translated into 140 characters or less on a Social Media platform. To tell a story or recount a memory from my past and to mentally prepare myself for the impending threat of middle age
Am I fit for 40?
Only time will tell…..
Fit for 40 